In 1937, Dale Carnegie published an amazing book. It was called “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” I was able to participate in the Dale Carnegie Program through Junior Achievement and read the book back then – the book although written back in the day, has many great tips and words of wisdom to improve your life and your business.
One of Carnegie’s statements that I really held onto was this: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”
This point continually comes up for me and most recently in these occasions:
1. My interview last week with a real estate expert: Our discussion was on raising capital and he mentioned the importance of asking lots of questions when selling to customers. By asking a lot of questions, you create rapport. You also figure out potential buying objections, that you can then overcome.
2. My meeting with a senior individual who managed the Vancouver Olympic sponsorships for her company: we discussed how she got into this narrow field and I asked her how to gain attention of individuals. And her answer echoed Carnegie’s quote. To get individuals interested, you need to become interested in them. You need to think about what motivates them, what they are looking to accomplish, and what a great story looks like to them. Then, you can pitch yourself in a way that aligns with their interests.
3. Networking: Great networking is NOT about going to an event or meeting people and saying, “Hi, I run an XYZ company. I’m looking for investors. Will you help me?”
Instead, it’s about connecting with people. It’s about being interested in others and learning about them.
So, next time you meet someone, ask the person about themselves. Where they grew up? What they do for a living? What they do for fun? And when they start asking questions to you, they will really pay attention to your answers.
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks the reminder Vishal – read Dale Carnegie AWHILE back; expressing genuine interest in other people really is an important point with which to get reacquainted! In fact, just a few weeks ago I got a chance to speak with colleague for longer than the typical 15 second “Hi! How are you!” Even though I work at a large company with 3000 people, when I took a moment to think about it, I realized that sadly I’d known her for 3 years and said barely anything beyond that same “Hi! How are you!” the entire time. In taking just a few minutes longer to ask her “What are you doing for the weekend?” and a few other questions, I learned that we’d both attended the same university, that she’d studied Kinesiology and not Marketing, her dad was a Golf Pro and she’d grown up traveling the world! How interesting and refreshing! Everyone has a great story to tell.
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